


Ghost

by aesthxtic



Category: One Direction (Band), Zayn Malik (Musician)
Genre: Angst, First Work Here, M/M, Multi, Non-Graphic Smut, Recreational Drug Use, Some Fluff, and other mix of ot5 ships, lilo, slight larry - Freeform, ziam, zouis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-03
Updated: 2016-09-03
Packaged: 2018-08-12 19:40:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7946632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aesthxtic/pseuds/aesthxtic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On August 16th, 2015, Niall Horan disappeared without a trace. </p><p>On August 16th, 2016, exactly one year after his disappearance, Niall's best friend, Harry Styles received a mysterious text message from the missing blonde.</p><p>-</p><p>Or the one in which Harry feels like he's chasing the ghost of what once was Niall Horan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The World's Eyes

 

_ _

 

_"Part of today’s news includes the story of the recent sudden disappearance of a small town boy from Arlington, 16 year old Niall Horan. Horan was declared missing last Tuesday after he was last seen hanging out with friends Saturday night and never managed to make it home. Horan was out that night, like many teenagers, enjoying his final days of summer break. According to friends who are believed to be the last ones to have seen him, Horan was out late watching the movie premiere of Straight Outta Compton, afterwards he hitched a ride with a friend whom claims he saw Horan enter his home perfectly safe at around one o’clock in the morning. Horan’s mother, Maura Gallagher, states that she had been waiting for her son to come home until three o’clock in the morning from the living room that overlooks the front door very easily and claims she never saw anyone open the door to come back in that night. Both statements are still currently under deep investigation. Not many details have been released about the ongoing investigation. Niall Horan is best known for being a fun and outgoing guy among his peers and friends. Horan was co-captain of his soccer and has passed most of his years of school with honors. If anyone knows any information about the disappearance of Niall Horan, please report so immediately. If you wish to support the family of Niall Horan, click the gofundme link below._

Harry exited out of the article and cried.


	2. The Before

Harry had told the officers and investigators his story countless times.  He didn’t quite know what they didn’t seem to understand about what he was saying. Harry remembered everything about that night, something like that isn’t something he could ever possibly forget. He’d explained what happened down to the last detail but he knew they were suspicious.

He was the last person to have had seen Niall after all. Not to mention that for some reason his story doesn’t match to Maura’s claim. All he can insist is that for some reason Maura missed Niall slip through the front door, but of course they’d believe Niall’s mother over Harry.

It was the sixteenth of August and they were set to start school that Thursday. Like many teenagers, they wanted to savor their last few days to the fullest before they were once again drowned by the endless amount of homework and projects they’d know were to occur the moment school started.

They were good kids, Harry and his friends that was. They didn’t party or drink, except Niall on occasion though he blamed it on being Irish. So unlike many kids their age, they didn’t have plans to party and shag until sunrise.

It was Liam’s idea of course, Liam had an odd obsession with rappers so he wanted to pounce at the shot on going to the Straight Outta Compton premiere. Harry hadn’t actually been very interested in watching the film, the fact he was more into romcoms being the main reason, but he’d be a mad man if he was strong enough to deny his friend’s puppy eyes. Niall had seemed excited enough to go, more liking the idea of hanging out with the lads than anything. Harry was also just happy they’d finally have a proper lad’s night out without any girlfriends. Not that Harry didn’t like their girls, but he was pretty tired of being the seventh wheel and he had missed his best friend’s.

Louis being Louis, the one among their group of friend’s whom wasn’t afraid to open his mouth and say what he thought, complained about going to see the movie the whole time but even he wasn’t strong enough to deny Liam.

Their day had started by all four lads playing some video games at Louis’ house but were quickly forced to go out after Louis’ many siblings began to become too much of a bother to bare and they moved to going to the park and played some soccer. Harry, being blessed with the wonderful gift of two left feet, had sat on the sidelines and simply watched. And if he had watched Niall more than the others, no one had had to know.

After having had gone home and showered, they had met together again and had some lunch before going bowling. Harry once again lacking any form of coordination had lost by an incredible amount of points, sadly only able to knock down two pins the whole game. Liam somehow managed to get a strike every round. Louis claimed he had cheated.

Then they finally had gone to see the film. Harry had become bored with the movie and managed to fall asleep within the first fifteen minutes. When he had finally awoke his head was rested on Niall’s shoulder and the credits were rolling on the large screen. Harry had become quickly embarrassed once he noticed the drool he left on the blonde’s shoulder. He had given Niall a sheepish smile as he wiped his mouth, Niall only had given him a shrug and a reassuring grin.

Once they left the theater, Liam and Louis arguing all about what was good and bad about the film, Harry had noticed how tired Niall seemed. He knew that the summer soccer training had been taking had been really tiring his friend out and Harry had insisted on taking Niall home. It didn’t take much convincing for Niall to agree and with quick goodbyes to their other friend’s, they were off.

They had left the theatre roughly around half past twelve. They had taken their time going home, discussing the movie and just chatting. Harry liked those moment with Niall, the ones that were just them two. He loved the other lads, he truly did but he and Niall had something special and for several months prior, their time of just them two had quickly diminished. Harry hadn’t quite understood why.

But then of course Harry had to screw it up when he had done something absolutely stupid when they had finally arrived at Niall’s house. They had been having such a good time and that half hour of talking brought weird feelings back to Harry and before Harry could have understood what he himself was even doing, his lips had ended up on Niall’s own thin ones.

It had been everything and more that Harry could have ever imagined. Niall had briefly kissed him back before gently pushing him back. Harry had been sure he had ruined their friendship entirely but Niall only gave his usual reassuring smile with tinted pink cheeks.

Without saying another word, Niall pecked his lips once more before he had gotten out of the car and walked to his front door. He had turned around one last time and gave Harry one final wave before entering his home and that was that.

That was the last time Harry ever saw Niall again.

He had left out the part about the kiss of course, not feeling comfortable with sharing the piece of information with anyone and Harry didn’t believe the investigators could make much use of that information anyways.

A year passed in a blurred mess to Harry after that. Interrogations with the same questions, pitied or menacing looks constantly being thrown at him, and nights spent crying became regular events in Harry’s life.

Until suddenly everything just seemed to stop. Niall’s case became declared a cold one about five months after his disappearance, and town folks along with the kids at school seemed to have had moved on.

But Harry couldn’t move on. His mom had taken him to several doctor’s appointments, and therapists. He’s depressed they had said. Of course he has, his best friend up and disappeared from his life without a trace after all. More pity.

Harry and his friends discovered how good alcohol and weed was that year.

And then the anniversary of Niall’s disappearance approached and Harry had made himself prepared to fall apart. Not that he hadn’t really already. The summer before his senior year, Harry had befriended Zayn, an infamous lad in their town. Zayn introduced him to the “good stuff” as he had called it and Harry had for once felt secure from the painful world.

Louis had at first refused to follow him until he and his long term girlfriend had called it splits halfway through the summer and he finally decided to succumb to Harry and Zayn’s constant temptation of numbness.

Liam being the stoic lad he was, completely refused. They had lost Liam as a friend that summer.

But on August sixteenth, exactly one year after his disappearance, Harry learned the hard truth that he could never escape the conundrum that was Niall.


	3. You're Gone and I Gotta Stay High

_“You're gone and I got to stay high_

_All the time to keep you off my mind,_

_High all the time to keep you off my mind,_

_Spend my days locked in a haze_

_Trying to forget you babe, I fall back down_

_Gotta stay high all my life to forget I'm missing you”_

**...**

They day that Harry’s life would once again spiral out of control began just like any other average day. If waking up and smoking two joints and already buzzed by the amount of alcohol he had already consumed before noon was considered average that was.

Harry knew what day it was, of course he knew and he had already made plans to get bat shit drunk and drugged with Louis and Zayn that night. Numbness. That’s all he ever craved these days.

He had gone down from his room just time for lunch, his family getting used to Harry’s antics. His mother gave him a glance when he sat down before sighing and turning away. His stepfather completely ignored his presence while his sister scowled at his direction. Harry swallowed, fingers itching for a cigarette.

“So, you excited for senior year, Haz?” His sister finally spoke, breaking the awkward silence. Harry looked up at her. She was going through her crazy colored hair phase again, opting for a blue tinted silver color. Harry at first wondered why she would purposely dye her hair grey but then Zayn did it too and he admitted it was rather neat. His sister, Gemma, like most of the time wasn’t wearing any makeup exempt for the light amount of mascara. She had claimed several times before that she loved what their mother gave her and she wouldn’t want to waste to cover it. Gemma was wieldy like that.

Harry once upon a time was like that too and he knows how much it breaks his family’s hearts to see the way Harry is throwing everything away. He saw their frowns, their sad eyes, the blames, the tears, he saw it all. They didn’t understand how much Harry needed that numbness to get through the days anymore; that he was ready to fall apart completely at any given moment.

“Yeah, I guess.” Harry muttered with a shrug and continued to pick at his lasagna. Once upon a time, his mother’s lasagna was one of Harry’s favorite foods. Now everything just tasted like bland oats and made his stomach upset. He knew his mother must’ve made that specific meal in hope to ease the edge of the day, his mother was always quite the pacifist. Only ever wanted peace and love.

“If he even graduates.” He heard his stepfather mutter under his breath. Gemma bit her lip while his mother awkwardly looked away and wiped her mouth with a napkin. Harry flinched and looked down at his lap.

“Robin, please.” His mother scorned. Robin ignored her and Gemma’s look and proceeded to eat as if he had done nothing wrong. Which Harry supposed he hadn’t. It was no secret that Harry’s grades were struggling. His once shiny 4.0 gpa was now suffering considered the fact that he failed most of his classes the past year or barely skimmed by with a D. If Harry kept it up, it was almost guaranteed he wouldn’t graduate.

Harry told himself that he didn’t care anymore; that he didn’t care about anything. But the lump in his throat and the guilt that ate away told him otherwise. He brought it upon himself though. He deserved it all, he’d say when his self-pity became worse than the pity of others.

...

“I think I’m in love.” Louis giggled as he stared at the joint in his fingers in front of him with crossed eyes.

“Nah mate, just high.” Zayn snorted as he took a long drag of his own joint.

“Mm,” Louis hummed with closed relax eyes as he gently swayed from side to side, “What’s the difference?”

Last minute all the boys had decided to ditch the party and just hang out at Zayn’s private art studio and just get drunk and high off anything they were able to get their hands on. They were sitting together on the floor Indian style with all their goods in the center.

Louis had gotten an early start and was higher than the empire state building before they had even gotten to Zayn’s place. He was always very bubbly and giggly whenever he’d get high which to Harry was always very entertaining to watch. Zayn was much more cool and collected when he was under the influence. Everything was just good to him. While Harry didn’t feel anything at all when he was high and to him, that was better than any ecstasy he’d ever taken.

“Shotgun anyone?” Louis asked with his signature devious smirk. Zayn hummed and simply leaned over and without hesitating, placed his lips onto Louis’ own giggling ones. Smoke seeped through small crevices their swished mouths had and unsurprisingly to Harry their antics took a much more heated turn, smoke continuing to escape and float around them. Harry had to admit it was pretty dang hot.

The hookups between the trio also became a constant. To them it was just another form of drug, another escape from it all. Harry didn’t do it often though, just when he was drunk enough or more desperate for an instant escape or when he knew either of the other boys needed it bad as well. Normally though, Zayn and Louis would just turn to each other for their needs.

So tonight he didn’t bother to do anything about his friend’s very public antics and instead just opted to lay down and watch the smoke swirl as it left his lips up to the low, splotchy ceiling. Normally on times like these he’d think of absolutely nothing but not tonight. Tonight he thought of everything, everything that was Niall Horan.

It appeared to him that the harder he tried not to think of him, the more he thought. It was slowly driving him mad. He needed more.

Harry turned on his side, pretending he didn’t noticed Louis stick his hands down Zayn’s trousers and reached for one of the little baggies in the middle. The white powder he desperately needed.

“You weren’t planning on taking that on your own now, were you?” Louis asked, heavily panting but with a happy grin on his face, hand still down Zayn’s pants.

“Unless you stop fooling around and come join me I probably will.” Harry attempted to joke but his quivering voice and slightly destressed look said otherwise. Louis frowned, took another hit, and untangled himself from Zayn, whom grunted unhappily, and made his way to Harry, turning him on his back and sitting on his lap.

Louis leaned down and opened his mouth and blew the smoke onto Harry’s face. Harry closed his eyes and took it all in, letting out a long sigh.

“We’ll make you forget. We’ll forget everything tonight.” Louis reassured into his ear, gently biting on it before softly giggling. He was so giggly now.

“Let’s do this boys.” Zayn interrupted making them look up. Zayn had brought out one of painting canvas and already made some lines for them to take.

“Oh fuck yeah!”

...

After a line of coke, another joint, and three beers, Harry was tempted to end it all. Not that he’d share that with Zayn or Louis of course. He didn’t wanted to die per say. Harry just believed that if he just happened to take a line of coke too many it would just be a mere inconvenience. He took in a deep breath and tried his hardest to clear his mind of such thoughts. He couldn’t afford to think like that. Numbness, he needed it.

Zayn, feeling inspired in his drugged daze, had gotten up at some point and began to paint. He was painting Harry he had said. Harry believed it looked more like a chicken. Zayn had flicked some paint on him in annoyance so Harry didn’t try to push that any farther.  

Louis at some point ended up falling asleep after he decided to strip of all clothing except for his tight briefs. His bare skin showing off all the tattoos he had gotten over the past year. He was currently snoring away beside Harry, looking peaceful and at ease. Harry envied him.

Harry’s phone went off beside him. Normally he wouldn’t bother to check on it, considering it was usually his concerned mother or sister which he much rather would not have had to deal with that until the next morning. Something in Harry made him feel the need to check his phone though so with a quick glance he pulled out his phone from his pocket.

**Niall: just feel**

Read his lock screen.

Harry stared at his phone for a good minute, proceeded to stuff it in his pocket once more, and then went over to prepare himself another line of coke.

“Hey, be careful with that. Don’t do much more.” Zayn warned in the distance.

Harry ignored him and inhaled.

Numbness at last.


End file.
